A condescending person might say something like, "Well, I would agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong." 2 They may be trying to prove how smart they are. Develop a clear vision and strategy. The employee who disregards training and basic tasks because "he already knows." By The news site of the Australian HR Institute. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. They had only known each other for about 12 hours, and Juliet was only 14, too young for marriage in her dad's opinion. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This expands upon the previous example, because it usually involves interrupting someone mid-sentence. Similar to the know-it-all, but different. examples of condescending behavior at work. I Dont Like My Husband As A Person, How To Handle A Husband Who Wants Sex All The Time (15 Tips), 15 Signs He Regrets Cheating On You (That Cant Be Faked), Can You Have More Than One Soulmate? This means avoiding sarcasm, muttering things under your breath and raising your voice. Unprofessional behavior can include a variety of behaviors, most of which are considered improper in a professional setting. LiquidPiston's patented thermodynamic cycle is making engineering history and they're taking investors while they do it. New Reasons for the Labor Shortage, Do You Know How to Have Conversations That Convert? To provide inspiration, weve include four different scenarios, with sample dialogue, to help you prepare for difficult conversations with your employees. Rather than approaching the conversation in a combative way, use the conversation as an opportunity to educate your boss about how you prefer to be addressed in a professional environment. MANAGER: Could you've helped Jack in another way to give correct information? Flying off the handle only makes the other person believe that their behaviour is justified. Be sure to read Lynnes books on how to handle tough conversations. ), 9 Highly Effective Ways To Deal With Condescending People, Help! This response allows you to take control of the situation, it also allows you to redirect the condescending nature of the employee. French is weird." Examples of this type of behavior can include: Being late for meetings or appointments without an acceptable excuse Displaying a lack of respect for colleagues, superiors, clients and customers Instead of dominating a conversation by talking all the time, try to listen more to others' opinions instead. Nathan acted as if he was superior to everyone in the room, using condescending words in every conversation. Still, if you've been told you have a condescending streak, here are some eye-roll-worthy behaviors to discontinue. By signing up you are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy. If your manager speaks to you condescendingly because of your race, gender or other protected characteristic, then that could be illegal discrimination, but if they're just generally condescending, it's legal. Firstly, it implies that you arent worth listening to and dont deserve respect. 2008 -2023 Lynne Eisaguirre | Privacy | Site Map Proudly Presented By: Learn more about our training offerings and check out our team members at: 3985 Wonderland Hill|Suite 106|Boulder, CO 80304, You may also call or write me to discuss your options at:303-216-1020 or, Newsletter Effective Online Training in Response to #metoo: Heres What You Need to Know, Newsletter Why You Need One-on-One Sensitivity Training AND Performance Management Training, What Leaders Can Learn About Retaliation From Andrew Cuomos Mistakes. Many complaints about bullying involve what complainants label as condescending or demeaning behavior. Create a culture of accountability. If you disagree with someone's opinion, there's no problem with saying that directly. Smile and respond with something positive. 7. You can just learn people's actual names. An older person can talk down to a younger colleague, but it can just as easily happen the other way around. You could say, Yeah, I totally get it how frustrating this is or Trust me, I get why this is so stressful., For example, if your boss tells you, I dont think you bothered to send the client information about the project, you could say, Ill double-check and send it over to them right now if they havent received it., If your boss directs their frustration about a company-wide problem towards you, redirect it with something like, I see how thats a problem. Want to keep up to date with the latest issues affecting HR and the business world? He seemed fine at first. Call Him on It. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Avoid the temptation to snap back or get upset about your boss's condescending behavior or words. To demean someone is to insult them. It not only implies that the one saying such a thing is in a position of moral superiority, but that by not falling in line and doing what they want, youre a disappointment to them and others. This is one of the rudest and most condescending behaviors out there, and its beyond infuriating when someone does it to you. How do you respond to condescending remarks? Steps to deal with condescension at work Analyze and compare some common minority group responses to prejudice and discrimination. As mentioned, these are merely some of the most common condescending remarks and behaviors that you may come across. But at this point the formula is pretty easy to spot, and often the praise on either side of the critique-the real point of feedback, typically-can feel forced. They aren't very empathetic. By understanding the different types of workplace behaviors employees may have, managers can help their teams increase performance and complete work tasks more effectively. Although its tempting to give the offender a piece of your mind, remaining calm is the best response. 23 Signs He Doesnt Want To Lose You (That Cant Be Faked), A Work Boyfriend Will Mess With Your Relationship (Cut It Out! The important thing to remember is that respectful two-way conversations involve reading cues from the other person. Overly familiar, one-size-fits-all nicknames-especially from people you interact with in a professional capacity-are generally not a good look. Here are some examples of condescending statements: "Well, I know YOU think that, but in reality" "Wait, so you REALLY thought that [insert think you actually did think here]" This response allows for the employee to explain themselves as well as allows them to rephrase any concerns they may have appropriately and respectfully. Every workplace contains a wide variety of people who behave in different ways. Calmly and professionally call out the patronizing person without making a scene or being dramatic by pointedly yet politely saying, "Gee, that comment sounded a bit condescending to me. I sued the last HR staffer that didnt know her place. Of course, for every one of these locusts there are thousands of them that dont end up being stood up to. Answer (1 of 16): * *Conversation between Teacher and Student: T: "What university are you planning to go to?" S: "Well, I've applied to [insert top three universities in the country]. Theyll speak with great authority about what everyone else should be doing, saying, choosing, wearing, eating, and so on, and then get incredibly offended if their advice isnt met with praise and appreciation. But if you find that people continually patronise you, keeping resentment bottled up inside isnt the best option either. Examples of condescending behavior include acting as if you know everything and are not open to new ideas, reacting to an upset with "well, that's never happened to me", offering unsolicited advice (unless you are a supervisor), not being open to feedback, referring to people in the group in the third person (even if they are sitting right Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more. Here are two classic examples: "This presentation turned out way better than your last one." "I could tell you didn't have a ton of time, but that project still looked good." Your intentions to offer a commendation are pure. It doesn't come cloaked in kindness. I enjoyed it. JANE: Well, the downside would be that we wouldn't have had the benefit of the correct information right away. Condescending co-workers can wreak havoc and hurt productivity. If the belittling behaviour continues, however, its best to seek advice from a supervisor or another HR professional. This response is often directed toward women, particularly in work or post-secondary environments. We provide both training and coaching on the subjects of condescending and demeaning behavior. Basically, its negative or critical feedback sandwiched between two compliments. Here are 12 types of workplace behaviors to consider: 1. Taking yourself out of the situation allows you as the manager to evaluate the employees' intentions: Mental distance provides you with the clarity to respond appropriately and effectively to every situation. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Explaining Stuff You Already Know This person will explain things like they're offering you valuable knowledge. 6. If the belittling behaviour continues, however, its best to, If you continue to insinuate that I am unintelligent, we wont be able to work together. (And then follow through on your warning.). Lets say someone is suffering from a debilitating headache and needs to go home from work. You don't have to give a compliment to give a critique. She asked them to repeat the title because she didnt quite catch it, and they rolled their eyes, repeated it, and said, Its in German, youve probably never even heard of it.. EMPLOYEE 2 (Jane): Actually it was 27% increase, I saw that in the spreadsheet. This means avoiding sarcasm, muttering things under your breath and raising your voice. This page contains affiliate links. You are giving them a positive way to view the situation while letting them know they are not above doing the tasks you ask of them. Heres an example in which a manager may call a subordinate into the office to give them some feedback: Hey champ! If your boss sends you an email that you think might have a condescending tone, try following up with them about it in their office the get a better idea of whether or not it was intentional. 28 September 2021. https://www.forbes.com/sites/work-in-progress/2012/07/03/how-to-deal-with-a-condescending-boss/?sh=8852f61523f3, https://hbr.org/2018/01/how-to-deal-with-a-passive-aggressive-boss, https://hbr.org/2014/12/the-right-way-to-bring-a-problem-to-your-boss, https://www.growthbusiness.co.uk/6-ways-counter-condescending-boss-2548689/, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understand-other-people/201802/dealing-difficult-boss, https://www.fastcompany.com/40411173/how-to-handle-your-bosss-condescension. Originally published Most people who behave this way toward others are incredibly insecure. Secondly, its a dominance thing. EMPLOYEE 1 (Jack): Based on my conversation with the customer, our latest launch . wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. If you win a game, you can say, "You win some, you lose some" instead of gloating. Also. It is very difficult to respond to patronising comments. All Rights Reserved | Contact Us | Advertise | Privacy Policy, 17 Examples Of Condescending Remarks + Behavior, telling a female member of the opposition party to calm down.. Everyone knows what it's like to be around someone who just doesn't make them feel great about themselves with their condescending tone of voice. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Level up your tech skills and stay ahead of the curve. Instead, focus on staying as calm as you can. [disapproval] The tone of the interview was unnecessarily patronizing . The constant interjection is simply not necessary and comes across as narcissistic. 15. There are all kinds of people who are unpleasant to be around-Debbie downers, complainers, jealous green monsters, mean-spirited snarks, and most anyone who wears neon sunglasses- but if you walk away from another person feeling worse about yourself, there's a good chance you've been dealing with a condescending person. 9. The most important step is to remember as the manager you are in the position of power and you do have the ability to fix the situation. They might happen between family members, colleagues, friends, or complete strangersall depending on circumstance and whats going on around them. Youll often get this type of remark from someone who considers themselves to be more intelligent or well-educated than you are. MANAGER: And what would have been the impact of that alternative approach? Leadership behavior. If you're not certain they're following what you're talking about, you can always ask, "Are you familiar?" Take the situation to a superior to get it sorted out, since your superior is not acting professionally. Interruption/talking over another. Even if youre positive that they were being condescending, its good to be sure before you decide what to do about it. Were committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. Related: 15 Things Men Say That Get on Women's Nerves. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. MANAGER: Which of the two assessments would you prefer, if you could repeat them? He holds an MA in Negotiation, Conflict Resolution, and Peacebuilding from California State University Dominguez Hills. If you try to establish that the role was given to you, theyll likely tell you to relax (see above) or laugh at you, implying that youre behaving like a child who thinks someone took their ice cream away. Aggression such as shouting, yelling and belittling comments are all obvious signs of condescension. Saying: "You NEVER do this." "You ALWAYS do this." "I'm sorry you feel that way." "You need to calm down." "Take it easy!" Other examples of condescending behavior include employees who oversimplify or overexplain things in a patronizing tone, call coworkers demeaning names like chief or sweetheart, correct little mistakes, interrupt and tell a coworker to calm down or make them feel like they're overreacting when they're not. Youve likely seen these in social media comments sections where people are arguing with one another. We use cookies to personalise content, provide social media features, and analyse traffic. Ignoring the perpetrator is often the best approach. You can set a great example for some of your newer co-workers with your knowledge. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. They might happen between family members, colleagues, friends, or complete strangersall depending on circumstance and what's going on around them. Examples of condescending behavior: Much like the remarks listed above, the behaviors below show up often when people are interacting with one another in person. be careful not to reply to a condescending person with more condescension. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c9\/Deal-with-a-Condescending-Boss-Step-5.jpg\/v4-460px-Deal-with-a-Condescending-Boss-Step-5.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c9\/Deal-with-a-Condescending-Boss-Step-5.jpg\/aid12653730-v4-728px-Deal-with-a-Condescending-Boss-Step-5.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"